Vision, Momentum, and Mastering the Business of Therapy with Lisa and Jen Taylor

Lisa:

Hi everyone! First of all, let me say Happy New Year to all of you tuning in as we kick off 2020. Thank you for joining me for another episode of the Lessons from the Playroom podcast.

I have a special guest with me today, someone who has been on before discussing a different topic. Last time, we talked about games, but today’s topic is different. She’s my partner in crime for the Business of Therapy course I teach, so we’re going to have a conversation about goals, resolutions, and all those related things.

Jen, do you want to say hi and introduce yourself?

Jen:

Hi! Thank you, Lisa, for having me on again. It’s always a pleasure to spend time with you.

For those who don’t know me, I’m Jen. I’m a therapist, teacher, and writer, as well as your co-facilitator for the Business of Therapy course. I’ve also been involved in retreats, courses, and other ventures for the therapy community. It’s good to be back!

Lisa:

Jen is the mastermind behind Jen Taylor! Part of what Jen loves is bringing people together in fun, creative ways for learning and adventure.

Jen, I’m going to hand this over to you to lead the conversation about goals. And to clarify, we’re not talking about play therapy goals, but personal life goals and visions for ourselves as play therapists. Over to you.

Jen:

OK, before we dive into that, let’s take a step back. I want to give you the chance to share a little about a goal you told me about years ago—this course we’re discussing today. Take us back to when you were creating it. What were you hoping to achieve?

Lisa:

Jen, how long have we known each other?

Jen:

Well, I called you in 2017 to invite you to be a guest on the Play Therapy Summit. Since then, we’ve worked on various projects together.

Lisa:

Right. Jen, it was inspiring to see you put on workshops and events—like the summit, which was the first of its kind. You created the first online Play Therapy Summit. That’s how I know you—innovative and creative, with a passion for bringing people together.

I had this idea, and you were the obvious person to bring it to life. I wanted to see if you’d be interested in helping me make my vision a reality because I knew you’d enjoy the production side.

About 15 years ago, I put on my vision board the goal of helping play therapists understand the business side of being a therapist. Most of us aren’t taught that in graduate school. I wasn’t, so I made it a priority to teach myself. Over the years, many people have asked me, “Lisa, how did you build Synergy, the Institute, and everything else?”

I wanted to create a course for therapists to understand the business side of things—but not just a regular business course. I wanted it to include the psychology of building a business and being an entrepreneur. I wanted to do the teaching but not the course-building, so I came to you, Jen.

We were in San Diego, working on another course, and I said, “Hey, I have this idea.” The rest is history.

Jen:

I remember that! I also remember our planning session in that beautiful conference room by the boats, where we started talking about visions and goals.

Now, at the beginning of this year, many people are thinking about their visions and goals. One of the things you do differently in your course is teach how to align personal visions with reality—how to create goals that are actionable rather than just wishful thinking.

Can you talk about the difference between resolutions and visions?

Lisa:

This time of year, people reflect on what they want to accomplish. They set resolutions, but by the end of the year, they often look back and realize they didn’t achieve them. That’s when the self-criticism begins—“There’s something wrong with me,” or, “I’m not good enough.”

None of that is true. There’s nothing wrong with the person. The problem lies with the goal.

It’s essential to set congruent goals, but that’s not something we hear often. Many goals are fantasy-based: “What do I wish my life looked like? How much money would I love to make?” But if we don’t create goals that align with who we are, we won’t achieve them because our energy naturally won’t go there.

Everyone is driven by a few key things that are most meaningful to them. These values are unique, like fingerprints, shaped by our life experiences—especially challenges. Interestingly, the areas where we’ve felt pain often become the areas we value most.

For me, teaching is a high priority, as are being a mom, business development, health and wellness, and travel. My life reflects this. If you looked at where I spend my time and money, what I think about, or the books I gravitate toward, it’s all aligned with these priorities.

So, if I set a goal outside those areas, I wouldn’t accomplish it. For example, if I woke up on January 1st and decided to run a workshop on learning about cars—because I heard it’s profitable—my hope, Jen, is that you’d ask, “Did you hit your head?”

Jen:

Exactly! Or, “Did an alien take over your brain?”

Lisa:

Right! That’s the message I want to share. Take an honest look at who you are and what your life demonstrates. Set goals aligned with that—not what someone told you to do or what you think you should do.

One quick story: when I started college, I was told by my grandmother, who I deeply admired, that I should be a lawyer. She believed I’d be great at it. So, I thought, “Well, they know me better than I know myself.”

I started studying for law school. During my first year of college, I hated my classes and was put on academic probation. Why? Because I wasn’t inspired by what I was studying. I spent most of my time socializing and exploring relationships, which was what truly interested me—especially the psychology of relationships.

I was trying to be someone I wasn’t, and it almost cost me my college education.

Jen:

And still, you are not a lawyer.

Lisa:

I am not a lawyer. No, I am not.

Jen:

That’s such a great example, though, because I think when people hear you talk about congruence or having a congruent vision, they might scratch their heads and think, “What does that even mean?” Hearing you explain it like this is really helpful.

Lisa:

Thank you. I’ll give you another example. When I first wrote the vision for the Synergetic Play Therapy Institute, it was all about training because I’m a teacher. I wanted to train therapists.

In my community, there was also a need for externship programs, so we created internship and externship programs that fit under the umbrella of training. At one point, one of the externs came to me and said, “Why aren’t we doing a parenting series? There’s a real need in the community for workshops and training for parents.”

It sounded like a fantastic idea, so we tried it—but it never took off. Someone might ask, “Why? You were still teaching.” True, but my inspiration at the time wasn’t in teaching parents; it was in teaching therapists. Even though it seemed aligned, it wasn’t fully congruent with my vision.

Today, my energy might align more with teaching parents, but at that time, it wasn’t part of the original vision for the Institute. The word “parents” wasn’t in the mission.

Jen:

Exactly. I’ve heard you say things like that many times before: “Is this about therapists? Is this about what they’re doing? Or is this something else?” You’ve been consistent with that filter, and it’s a great example for others to develop their own filters. It helps people ask, “Does this align with what’s most important to me, my unique fingerprint?”

Lisa:

Exactly.

Jen:

So what happens when I don’t get things done? What happens when I don’t complete my big mission for the year, even when I think I’ve got it all lined up?

Lisa:

There are a couple of possibilities. One, there might be a component of the goal that isn’t fully congruent with who you are, even if some aspects are. It’s important to take a deeper look and ask, “Am I fully in my sweet spot?” When you’re in your sweet spot—or flow—you’re at your most magnetic and have the highest ability to create.

Now, let’s talk about the feedback we get when we’re not in alignment. Recognizing this feedback is crucial, so we don’t fall into negative self-talk.

As you know, I teach a lot about the nervous system and dysregulation. When we’re trying to be someone we’re not, one of the key feedback signals is dysregulation in our autonomic nervous system.

Pay attention to dorsal responses, where you feel shutdown or disconnected. Pay attention to your autonomic state—it’s trying to tell you how well you’re being yourself.

Now, that doesn’t mean pursuing your dreams won’t be scary. Fear is a natural part of going after something big. In fact, you can be crystal clear about your vision—it can feel congruent, inspiring, and like an absolute no-brainer—but it’s still not happening.

That’s when you need to check the fear. Fear will always be the ceiling of your innovation. It’s like a stop sign you can’t move beyond until you address it.

Every time you put an idea into motion or set a goal, you’ll hit fear. It’s inevitable. Our physiology tells us to run away from it, to avoid it, because it’s scary. But fear is actually the doorway. It’s trying to show you the path forward.

Fear might be pointing to a belief like, “I’ll be rejected,” or, “People won’t like me,” or, “I might fail.” You can’t fully bring your vision into the world unless you move through that fear.

Jen:

I feel a little afraid just listening to you talk about this! I know when we get to this part of the Business of Therapy course, the room collectively holds its breath.

Lisa:

Yes!

Jen:

It’s like, “Oh no, here come all my fears.” But part of your unique gift in this course is helping people address that fear.

Lisa:

Absolutely. We don’t just sit in the fear. I teach tools for working through it, transforming it, and turning it into fuel.

Jen:

And the energy in the room shifts. People go from feeling stuck to becoming curious about the fear. It’s like magic—you help participants become open to exploring the very thing that was holding them back.

So, as we wrap this up for those setting goals at the start of the year, what’s a practical way to pull everything together? How can they take the big idea in their head and turn it into reality?

Lisa:

One of the biggest things is spending time visualizing and dreaming. Most people don’t dedicate enough time to this—they might think about it for a few minutes here and there, but that’s not enough.

Great entrepreneurs spend more time thinking about their business than working in it. It might sound backward, but it’s essential. You need clarity about what you’re trying to achieve before you can take action.

Find a quiet space to dream. Give yourself permission to really think about what you want to create. While you’re dreaming, remember to stay grounded—distinguish between fantasy and congruency.

Here are a few things to consider:

1. What makes you unique? If you’re going to make an impact, it requires embracing your uniqueness.
2. What are your life experiences? No one else has lived your life, so no one else has your exact perspective.
3. What are your strengths, knowledge, and approach? These are the building blocks of what makes your vision special.

For example, if a play therapist wants to open a private practice but there are 50 others in their community, how do they stand out? How do parents know to choose them? The answer lies in their uniqueness.

Take time to write down what makes you different. This will help you create something magical and authentic. Honor your uniqueness—it’s the foundation of your vision.

I’ll pause here. What are your thoughts so far?

Jen:

Well, the more you talk, the more my brain fires on all cylinders. My first thought is about this paradox we’ve seen in the course and in conversations with therapists. On one hand, they feel like, “I’m just like everyone else. This has already been done before. How am I going to avoid repeating something that’s already out there?” On the other hand, they worry, “If I’m too different, people will laugh at me, make fun of me, or think I’m outside the norm.”

You’re helping people find that balance—one foot in, one foot out—where they’re on the edge of what’s familiar and what’s new.

Lisa:

Exactly. It’s about being right on the edge of the window of tolerance for your audience—familiar enough, but with something slightly different.

Jen: 

Yes. And recognizing that balance is hard for people because we often overlook what’s special about us. For example, I might think, “Being a military spouse who’s lived in six states isn’t that special—I know lots of military spouses.” Or, “Being a mom of twins isn’t that special because I know lots of moms of twins.”

But when you start layering these experiences together, you begin to realize, “Oh, this combination gives me a unique perspective.” It’s not just one thing—it’s how all these pieces come together to shape your approach.

Lisa:

Absolutely. That’s exactly it. Embracing our uniqueness is so important.

Jen:

It’s hard to do, though. And that’s something you keep coming back to in the course—helping people identify what’s special about them and their businesses. Then you also cover the business aspects we didn’t learn in school. Can you give an overview of what else is included in the 2.5 days of the course?

Lisa:

Of course. One of the main topics is the mindset of being an entrepreneur. If you’re creating a business, you are an entrepreneur, and there’s a specific mindset that comes with that.

For example, entrepreneurs embrace challenges. That’s different from the way the brain naturally wants to avoid challenges. Entrepreneurs say, “Bring it on. I know challenges are inevitable, so I’m going to choose the challenges I work on.”

We also talk about money. Jen, we could do an entire podcast on this topic alone. Our field has really confused making money with selfishness or entitlement. It’s failed to recognize that making money allows you to provide greater service.

I’m not saying selfishness doesn’t exist—of course, some people make money selfishly. But most therapists, by nature, are service-oriented. When they have access to more resources, they can offer scholarships, build new programs, hire more staff, or serve more people. Money becomes a tool for greater impact.

We break down these misconceptions about money and explore its psychology. I share my own journey with it—moving away from the belief that making money is wrong and toward appreciating money as a form of exchange.

We also cover how to weather the storm when things get hard. Many business courses focus on strategy and planning but don’t teach you how to manage the psychology of turbulence—when things get shaky, overwhelming, or go wrong.

That’s one of my favorite parts of the course: stabilizing your psychology so you can navigate challenges effectively.

Jen:

That’s so important. And then you help people break their big vision into smaller, actionable steps.

Lisa:

Exactly. We create a strategic plan for the year, breaking down the vision into manageable pieces. This process builds momentum, which leads to real success stories—people writing books, launching podcasts, hiring staff, or opening new service lines.

I want to highlight the momentum piece. At last year’s course in New Orleans, there was a group that had attended every year since we started. Watching them evolve was inspiring.

In their first year, they began peeling back layers. In subsequent years, their congruency became clearer, and their visions shifted slightly as they aligned more with their true selves. Now, they’re experiencing incredible momentum—more congruent versions of themselves showing up year after year.

This aligns with the concept of compounded interest. In finance, you might save money and feel like you’re not making much progress at first. But eventually, there’s a threshold where things accelerate. The same applies to building a business.

For many therapists, the expectation of overnight success leads them to stop too soon. They don’t realize that what looks like an “overnight success” often takes years of consistent effort.

Jen:

I think Jeff Bezos said that.

Lisa:

Yeah, there’s no such thing as overnight success. But there is that compounded interest piece I was talking about. People often get frustrated because they don’t experience immediate gratification. Instead of staying with it—adjusting, fine-tuning, listening to feedback—they stop.

Success requires repetition: becoming known for something, doing it again and again. But many people fail to gain traction because they get frustrated with the journey and just quit.

Jen:

Yeah. It’s interesting because while you were having that “Oh my gosh, look at this group” moment, I was reflecting on another dynamic I’ve noticed in the course. Some participants feel like, “I’m so far behind. These people have taken the course three times, and I’m here for the first time. There’s no way for me to catch up.”

That sense of shame, frustration, and hopelessness creeps in, like they’ve missed the boat. Then they wonder, “How can I possibly paddle fast enough to catch up with everyone else?”

Lisa:

Well, the language you just used points to the answer. If you’re trying to catch up with someone else, you never will—because it’s their dream, not yours.

You’d be paddling in the wrong body of water. The real question is, how quickly do you want to paddle in your dream? It’s not about catching up with anyone else; it’s about staying congruent with your own pace and timing.

Everyone is exactly where they need to be in their journey. No one is behind, no one is ahead, no one is better or more successful. If we fall into that comparison trap, it’s because we’re not appreciating what we’ve already built in our lives.

For example, maybe someone has built a thriving business and you’re comparing yourself to them. But if you look closely, you’ll realize that business wasn’t your priority—your priority was raising your kids. When you look at that relationship, it’s a gold mine. You’ve been incredibly successful there.

Wealth and success aren’t just about money or career. They’re about where you’ve chosen to put your energy and what’s meaningful to you.

Jen:

Right. And there it is.

Lisa:

That’s the heart of the Business of Therapy course. When we sat down to design it, our vision was to create a no-competition space—a place where everyone could grow at their own pace and celebrate their unique contributions.

We wanted it to be a space where therapists could do amazing, impactful work in their communities, their families, and the world—and keep coming back year after year because they found so much value in the process.

It’s such a special thing that we’ve even expanded the course to two locations this year!

Jen:

Yes! It’s so exciting.

Lisa:

So, for those feeling inspired to learn more, here’s the scoop. This year, we’re offering the course in two locations.

In the U.S., we’ll be in San Diego, with both in-person and virtual options available. Then, we’re heading to Sydney, Australia, for our international course. That one will be in person only.

We always hold these courses toward the end of the year—September through November—so participants can reflect on the year and start planning for the next one.

Jen:

Perfect. So for everyone listening, add this to your vision board or goal-setting chart. Decide where you’re going—San Diego or Sydney—and start planning. Maybe it’s saving a little extra money, taking on an extra client, or adjusting your schedule. Whatever it takes, give yourself this gift.

Lisa:

Absolutely. And honestly, if someone gets just one additional client after taking the course, it pays for itself.

Jen:

Or it could be something else—like landing a keynote, adding a service line, or stopping unnecessary expenses because you’ve gained clarity on your priorities.

Lisa:

Exactly. Or simply getting clear on what’s important to you. What’s that worth?

Jen:

It’s priceless. This course is my favorite thing you do, Lisa. I’m so grateful to be part of it, to witness the transformations, and to support you in bringing your genius to the world.

Lisa:

Thank you, Jen. This collaboration works because we appreciate what’s meaningful to each other and leverage our strengths together. Thank you for being my copilot and for bringing your brilliance to the table.

Jen:

Well, I’ll see you in Sydney!

Lisa:

Yes! And for anyone curious, visit learn.synergeticplaytherapy.com for details about the Business of Therapy course.

Wherever you are in the world, take time to dream. Think about who you are, what’s important to you, and how you move through the world.

We’ve been talking about goals and resolutions in this episode, but this also ties into being the most important toy in the playroom. Honoring yourself for who you are, what you bring, and what matters to you is key.

Until next time, take care.