People-Pleasing in the Playroom

People-pleasing in the playroom happens, and not just with children; therapists get caught in people-pleasing too!  This ever-so-familiar coping strategy is often covering up challenges a child or therapist may not yet be able to face. Recognizing why this happens and what to do when it happens is the first step to creating a session filled with integration instead of placation.

:57 Lisa introduces LFPR series

1:27  People pleasing is part of the human experience

2:15 Kids often people please to get the approval of the therapist

3:00 Kids people please as a form of connection

3:30 How does directive play set the stage for people pleasing?

3:50 People pleasing in parents

4:30 How does people pleasing cause illusion? How is it a coping strategy?

5:45 Incongruence in play therapy

6:30 How does people pleasing interfere with the ability to set boundaries?

8:00 People pleasing as a way to shut down emotions

8:50 Bringing regulation into the playroom

9:51 People pleasing as a form of self-preservation

10:23 People pleasing as subordination

11:24 Why does people pleasing feel good to the therapist?

11:40 Moving away from people pleasing and the importance of authenticity

13:30 Teaching the child to address their own needs and ask for what they want

14:30 People pleasing behavior in the therapist

15:00 Episode 19: Rejection as a Gift

17:50: Episode 30: Mirror Mirror on the Wall – The Client is You After All 

18:17 What happens within us when people pleasing occurs?

19:03 Moving towards or away from people pleasing

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